10 Reasons To Date a Lifeguard by justashell, literature
Literature
10 Reasons To Date a Lifeguard
10* Our uniforms are skimpy
9* Our Motto is \'Go in Hard, Come out Wet\'
8* We know how to get your blood pumping
7* Two of us can work on you at once
6* We all are experts at mouth-to-mouth
5* We know all the ways to stroke
4* We\'re always ready to blow
3* We like Front Drive or Rear Huggy
2* We know when to straddle you and thrust
1* We wont stop until the paramedics need to take you;-)
I like strange things. Physics, books, music, vampires, Jared Padalecki, Ian Somerhalder, Brendon Urie, Andy Biersack, and Pete Wentz. Ask me about bands. Not to mention, I'm Swishalicious.
Well, it's been 11 months, but I've finally hit 1,500 page views ! I'd like to thank all of my fans, everyone who has ever favored my work, and to everyone who commented. It really truly means a lot to me *receives an Oscar* NOW I'M GOING TO DISNEY WOOOOOOOOOOO !
Ha ha, but in all seriousness, thank you from the bottom of my heart. 1,500 is a really amazing milestone for me.
So I'm just saying I hope everyone had a very happy Halloween. It's my FAVORITE holiday, mainly because I'm creepy, but never the less, I hope everyone enjoyed themselves. I bet you can't guess what I dressed up as! Go on, try! (No cheating, Sonja!)
While I'm on this topic. . .
Why do girls always dress slutty for Halloween? Can you say "desperate"?
I mean really . . . and then they post pictures on Facebook that make them look sluttier. It's the only day of the year they can really get away with it. But I am watching you. . . muhahaha.
Wow, that was creepy.
So anyways, if anyone has any funny/scary/random stories involving them and Hall
Helllllloooo, Dear Reader!
I'm a proud to say that I JUST made a deviantArt account, and I must say, I'm feelin' pretty awesome right now!
So just a little getting to know you session.
My name is Cristiana Claire. I go by Claire mostly because some people don't know how to pronounce my first name, and I kinda like my middle name better. It makes things easier.
I am a HUGE physics nerd. I come armed with an arsenol of physics joke, so watch out!
I was accepted to several colleges two years early, but my parents didn't want me to go off to Texas. I believe that words "wide eyed" and "innocent" were used. Now I'll only be going a year early
Hey there nice to meet you, i love your pictures and artwork they truly are amazing. Keep up the great work, i'm sure your magnificent creations will touch the hearts of a lot of people one day!